Mother's Guilt

One month from today I am scheduled to go back to work.
This makes me sad and happy.

I am looking forward to having adult conversations, being forced to shower every day, seeing my clients, starting the new program I've been named director of and, making money.

BUT, I'm going to miss Mr. Mister so much. He has thrown a wrench into my workaholism. I just want to stay home and smell him right in the nape of his delicious neck... all day long.

We're still trying to decide what we're going to do for childcare. I want a nanny but as the day gets closer to where we need someone, I don't know if I trust anyone to take care of my baby like I do.

What if he misses me?
What if I miss something?
It almost makes me sick to think about.

I keep rationalizing that I'm going back to work to make a better life for my family; especially my little boy. But, who says a better life means leaving him 2+ days per week?

The other part of me knows that I would feel stagnant staying at home. I've worked SO HARD to get where I am with my career(s). My work is so fulfilling.

But, motherhood is so much more rewarding.

I now completely understand "mother's guilt."

The grass is indeed greener

It was a big decision for our family when I decided it was time for me to leave the large agency I was working at. It meant going from a job that provided benefits and stability (sick time,vacation time, short-term-disability, and A SALARY) to going "willie-nillie" and basically being in business with myself, getting paid per client.

Kind of.

So, how it works: I am part of a private group practice. The practice is owned by two doctors who oversee the process (one of the doctors I refer to as "my boss"). They hire who they feel would be a great additions to our practice; meriting the reputation that has been built over the past 20+ years.

When I started to loath going to work, I began to look for new positions; I saw this job online and I applied for it. On paper, I'm highly qualified, however, I think it's natural to be suspicious of a twenty something (at the time) who wants to go into the private arena of psychology/therapy. Once I had more information after talking to "my boss" over the phone, I honestly thought, "There is NO WAY they are going to hire a 29-year-old freshly licensed (although, dually licensed) clinician." But, hey, what did I have to lose? I went in for an interview anyway and it was 2 hours long! I left feeling pretty good about what I had to offer (and vice-versa). A couple of weeks later they called me back to hold a clinical case presentation for the 6 doctors and 2 master level clinicians working at the practice. That was scary!

However, being the consummate optimist I thought, "If nothing else, I'll at least have thrown my hat in the ring and put myself out there; toe-to-toe with seasoned DOCTORS." I left feeling okay after that. I was a little concerned because I would be the youngest clinician there... by a SIGNIFICANT number of years. I just felt really... novice.

I shouldn't have worried. They loved me. They hired me immediately. I know my shit, people. ;)

Once I committed to taking the job, I feared there would be a catch. There were SO many things I loved about the work I was already doing and the agency I was working for. I was definitely getting cold feet. Something had to be too good to be true. I make my own hours. I decide who I want (and don't want) to see. I wear what I want. I have free consultation provided to me (yes, I lose a percentage of the money I bring in but, it's certainly a fair percentage for what they provide for me). There had to be something!! As I approach my year anniversary there, the only catch I have found thus far is that I don't get sick or vacation time; I'm not a salaried employee.

Recently, I was offered another opportunity (an amazing opportunity) to expand a new program within our group, with the support of my boss (he has so much faith in me!!) I feel like a Golden Goose!  In our discussions about this "project" his biggest concern was how he could recognize if I was getting burnt out, or if I was getting enough time with my family/baby should I decide to take the opportunity he presented me with.

Are you kidding me? I'll still only be working 3 days per week, doing what I love, and adding a component of having staff to clinically supervise. (Something I mostly gave up when I left my last job- [I still clinically supervise one person from my former agency.]) This peice was something I missed very much. I won't have to work too much harder (maybe a bit of sweat equity to outreach to the masses about our new services) but other than that... not much. I already have a great referral base and have one person hired with another interview scheduled for the beginning of May. This is really happening!!

So, over maternity leave, I won't have to work for 2 months but, when I return I'm starting a substance abuse program. I have a whole suite (with 3 offices) to furnish with my fine decorating style and ability to hire good clinicians. It's very exciting. Further, I have the support of an amazing "boss", mentor, and Doctor if I get stuck, (or tired.)

Recently, when I was listing off some of the things I wanted to accomplish over maternity leave, he said, "If you try to work during your maternity leave, I'll fire you." Now, keep in mind he was kidding because he doesn't pay for my maternity but, he "has my number" and he set a boundary for me because y'all know about my dysfunctional relationship with work. He's one of those wise old-school psychologists who can pretty much read your mind so he's not letting me slack in the self-care department. I need someone like that. I need that kind of discipline. It was nice to feel as though he valued my happiness more than the golden egg I lay.

Today, I had to cancel all my clients because of a pregnancy related issue (don't worry, all is fine with Mom and Baby.) Even the concept of calling out is different when you're in private practice. I call my clients. I don't need to call anyone else. I don't have to check with a supervisor. I don't get paid if I don't work so nobody really cares when I'm there or not. That took SO MUCH pressure off my decision to take care of myself today.

I hit the jackpot with this job and I am so grateful.

New Beginnings

It's official. After months of searching (in the most conscientious of ways) I have accepted a new job. Now, you have to understand what a HUGE move this is for me. It was something I went back and forth about for months. I love the work I do, I love my kids, I love my peers, I love my supervisor, program and agency. BUT, I love my family more.

See, the problem is the current number of hours I'm scheduled. Yes, I work too many hours but that wasn't necessarily the issue. I very much dislike the schedule of the hours I work. Many nights, because of the nature my job, I would often work until at least 7:30pm. That isn't very conducive to the thought of starting a family (or getting much of anything else done). June 24th will be my last day at my current place of business. There have been some tears on my part already but I'm really looking forward to my new adventure.

I've accepted a position in a private practice. So what that means is that I'll (basically) be working for myself. I pick my hours, I pick my clientele; everything is up to me. I've decided to work 3 days per week, one of which will probably include a late night- (but only ONE- not three, and if I don't like that, I can change it!) I've also picked up another class for the fall 2011 semester- so the other two days I'll work at the school from 8-12 and then I'm done for the day. Can you imagine?

I'm very excited about the prospect of learning new things with a different population of clients. I'll still be doing some substance abuse treatment but let us not forget I'm dually licensed so I can treat mental health concerns and substance abuse issues. Financially, this will be a great move for us but I will be losing the security of being a salaried employee (which is a tiny bit scary).

Aaron has been incredibly supportive of the move and my new "boss" (per se-- the owner of the practice) has been very understanding of my need to transition slowly out of my current position. He has been nothing but supportive of how hard of a transition this can be.

As soon as I get my beautiful new office decorated (sneak peek- it's a corner office with a view of a foot bridge and brook) I'll post pictures. This is going to be a busy/sad/exciting time for me. I'm not going to lie in that my heart hurts as I leave my current position but, this move makes sense and will provide much opportunity in a variety of life areas.

Wish me luck!

Photographic Friday

There are a few things Aaron and I have agreed to do lately: 1.) Play games instead of watch TV or do an independent activity when we get home from work. 2.) Go on a date every Monday night and 3.) Enjoy long walks in the morning.

We have stuck to it! I have to say, after a long day, coming home and playing a game with Aaron has improved our relationship. It helps me to unwind and prevents us from getting into deep discussions about the wedding, work, or other "life things" that people often spend too much time worrying about anyway. During the week we have such limited time and opposing schedules so we see each other for approximately two hours per day- we need to use this time wisely.

As for our dates: every Monday evening we either go out for a drink or do dinner somewhere. Usually it's just the two of us but, occasionally, we go with a friend or family member.

The mornings are my favorite: we get up early, saddle up the pups, and take them for a long walk before coming home to have a cup of coffee and get ready for the day ahead.

I'm loving this! However, school is starting soon. Hopefully we'll be able to keep this up when the world further challenges our schedules.

Sequence! We love this game. And yes, those are Swedish fish and Milk duds. Doesn't everyone eat those when they play games? For us, it's necessary!

School's Out...

Aaron on his first ever day of teaching, September 2007

Friday was Aaron's last "official" day of school, which means today is Aaron's first "official" day of summer vacation. I use the quotation marks because, while he is on "vacation," there are things he needs to complete over the summer for the next school year. Many people don't seem to understand that while teachers get "13 weeks" of summer vacation they still have to use the time to revise IEP's, edit their curriculum, add new material, and catch up on the most recent information to stay ahead of the learning curve. Hopefully, somewhere in all that, he'll enjoy a summer vacation!!!!! (and complete the "wife's" honey-do-list.)

Next year is going to be a big year for us. We'll get married (it's coming up-- about 3+ months!!!) Aaron is starting graduate school in the fall, he'll be tenured at the end of next year, and I am due to receive both my licenses by November!! Very exciting stuff.

So, this summer, we'll need to enjoy ourselves. We have some loose plans which include:

• Go to camp
• Go to Pennsylvania (I want to go to Amish Country)
• Plan the rest of our wedding/honeymoon(s)
• Finish up some miscellaneous house projects
• We are, again, spending the weekend in the Berkshires (Tanglewood) and this year we're seeing Yo-Yo Ma, Sheryl Crow and James Taylor!!! Who-hooo!
• Do some serious hiking and kayaking
• Spend a lot of time with friends
• Rest and Relax
• Read for pleasure (!!!!)
• Help to plan my Dad's 50th!!!
• And several, SEVERAL other things I don't have time to list here!

It's oddly strange, in the two years Aaron has been teaching I haven't felt like summer was "official" until he had his last day of school. It's funny, actually. The whole month of June my anticipation was building as if I was going to get some type of reward for him finishing up the year (well, if you saw "the list" you would see I am actually getting a reward.)

Now, if we could just conjure up some sunshine!

Moving on up and making changes

Me, on the day I received my Master's Degree. The look of pride and satisfaction says it all.

I've known for quite some time that I was being considered for a promotion; probably since August to be exact. But, before I get into that, let me first explain the logistics of my job.

I am an adolescent substance abuse therapist. So what? What does that mean? Honestly, it means the world to me. I work with teens 12-22 who have addiction problems. I perform assessments, do individual treatment, but mostly my job description entails doing group therapy with teens.

Some therapist's lead group others are group leaders. I fall into the latter. I. am. really. good. at. being. a group. leader. Not that I am tooting my own horn, I just know that I do an amazing job with groups. It's almost as though it was my destiny. I know what my strengths are. I can clearly identify them. For instance, I am just alright at individual treatment. I see progress in my clients, they feel like our work together is helpful, I use evidence based practices--BUT, I don't love individual treatment. As a therapist, it requires a piece of intimacy from me that I don't have. On the other hand, I love groups. I can be myself and an amazing leader in groups. I feel good about my career choice when I do groups, and it was noticed.

I was recently promoted to Senior IOP (Intensive Out-Patient) Clinician. Basically, it means that I am still doing the same thing I have been I just got a new title, a nice little raise and only a couple more responsibilities. But structurally, much remains the same, with the exception that almost all decisions about our group treatment program have to be cleared through me. However, internally for me, it means a lot. It means I was finally recognized for the hard work I do, I was finally recognized for being good at what I do, and I was given two people to supervise which means I am good enough to work with other professionals in our program to help them grow professionally.

This has been a big year for me, personally and professionally. Balancing that is very difficult. I recently passed my LADC and LCMHC exams (very big accomplishments) but both required a lot of prepping and studying. That time had to come out of my personal life.

Aaron and I are two very busy people. Last weekend, Aaron and I were relaxing, watching a movie, The Family Man and as we watched it together, Aaron looked over at me and said "that could totally be you." I had a mini-catharsis, if you will. I could totally be "Jack." For those who haven't seen the movie, Jack is the main character, played by Nicolas Cage. The premise of the movie is that he is an Ebenezer Scrooge, works all the time, consumed by his career, jettisoned all the joys in life to work 24/7/365. However, on Christmas Eve, he is transported to a different time, a place where he is married, has children, the family life- things he would have had, had his life taken a different course. Jack doesn't realize what he was missing because he never knew what he didn't have.

So, I don't know if I am even articulating this correctly, because it's hard for me to put it into feelings/words. But many times Aaron has to call me to remind me to come home at night. It's not that I'm avoiding coming home, it's just that I get so wrapped up in what I am doing at that moment. I am so in love with what I do. I just have to get "one last thing" done. It's hard for me, at the time, to realize how selfish I can be when it comes to work. I have always been like this. What's the problem? The problem is that often I'll work 12 hours in a day without realizing it. This is bad in a lot of ways; as a professional I have to be very careful and monitor myself. I need to take care and prevent getting compassion fatigue and burn out.

As a person in a relationship I also have to monitor this. Aaron is very good at his career, but when the job is done he can come home and relax. I'm just not built like that. It doesn't make me better than him, and as a matter of fact, I see my work ethic as a bit dysfunctional. I need to dot an exceptional job, I need to get one more thing done, I need to put in a few more hours, I need to make sure... I need, I need, I need. No. I am in a partnership with Aaron. I need to let him compliment my career, I certainly don't want him to feel like he has to compete with it.

I guess that point I'm trying to make, is I love what I do, a little too much. It's nice to be recognized for my efforts; but I still need to remind myself on a daily basis that I work to live, not live to work. I think this promotion is going to help me do that. I will have to work on delegating, balancing, and setting limits for myself and others. I have already begun doing this. I now leave the office around 3:30 on Mondays. I'm gone by 8:00 on Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursdays, and Fridays, if I go in at all, I leave by 1:00 (on most days). I no longer "work from home" unless that day, I truly am "working from home." And a new rule in our house; we don't talk about work. If we do have something to say we make it a point to ask the other if we can talk about work. It sounds ridiculous, but Aaron and I have such similar jobs that we could spend HOURS, literally hours, bouncing ideas, theories and interventions off one another.

So, to celebrate my promotion and passing my exams, this weekend Aaron and I are getting away. On Saturday we are going to see The Grinch Musical at the Wang in Boston. Then, we're going to see the big tree in Boston, have a nice dinner, do some last minute Christmas shopping. We have reserved a room here: "The Inn." We're are staying in the Tedford Room and will be treated to what I hope is an amazing breakfast in the morning. So exciting. I really need time away from reality, with Aaron. That is all I really need in life.

What are your thoughts?

Okay, reader challenge.

Read this and comment. Please, all of you. I don't ask much but I am really curious about your thoughts.

I'll tell you what I think; my opinion as a substance abuse therapist.

• Two of five college students are binge drinkers.*
• 1,400 college students die each year from alcohol related injuries.*
• 70,000 students are victims of alcohol-related sexual assaults each year.*

Lowering the drinking age is not going to help "kids" make more responsible decisions, it just gives them license to engage in dangerous behaviors.

The human brain is not fully developed until 21-25 years-of-age. Introducing foreign chemicals into the body can be detrimental to normal development not to mention create a heightened propensity to form an addiction.

The drinking age was lowered at one point in time, during the Vietnam War, when the draft was instituted. Do you know what happened when the drinking age was lowered? There was a dramatic increase in alcohol related deaths because kids are not responsible or emotionally mature enough to be making informed decisions about alcohol.

Some facts about booze:

• Alcohol is the #1 date rape drug.
• Alcohol is the #1 most widely abused drug in the U.S.
• Alcohol is the #1 gateway drug.
• Alcohol is the only substance in which a chronic abuser can die during withdrawals and detox.
• Alcohol is not an illegal substance to buy or possess (under most circumstances) if you are over 21-years-of-age
  

Playing Devil's advocate, and for the sake of argument, there are some good points about lowering the age to 18:

• The market for fake IDs would diminish.*
• College students could drink in their dorms instead of their cars.*
• Law enforcement money could be redirected to other programs.*
• Students would not be asking others to buy large amounts of liquor for them.*
  

So folks, what are your thoughts? In honor of Red Ribbon Week, lets start a debate. Please, please, please participate.

*extracted from http://www.oregoncatalyst.com/index.php?/archives/1657-The-Drinking-Age-A-Spirited-Debate.html

Unemployed

I think I want to quit my job and be a stay-at-home Mom.
Of course I can't quit and I don't have any 'human' children.
Perhaps I can just be a housewife? Oh the horror... where is my liberation? I just want to be barefoot in the kitchen hiding Aaron's baby inside my womb...

Okay, I'm being overly dramatic... I just really don't want to go to work today :(

Boston for the week

Here I am, again, at yet another work conference. This time down in Boston for the A-CRA training. Did I say Boston? Oops, I meant Natick; right across the street from the Natick Collection... just what qualifies as a work expense?

Aaron and I came down to Boston early this morning because I was a guest at an honorary luncheon hosted by Dana Farber for all of its donors. So it worked out perfectly that I was able to scoot right over the the hotel they are putting me up at, as Natick is only about 20 minutes outside of Boston.

The luncheon was amazing. I was able to meet a ton of other donors and, as a surprise, they reunited one recipient with her donor in front of everyone. I don't think there was a dry eye in the house. It was so nice to be honored for my donation, and to be recognized by others who truly understand the pride that one feels with giving life to someone else. We all received a gift and a certificate. I will post pictures later.

So, stay tuned for the training saga... at least I am here with a few friends, I will make the best of it.

Wednesday, Oui? aGAIN?

So many "Oui's" so little time! This "Wednesday, Oui?" is going to be about my career.

I have a very difficult job with an ambiguous success rate. What is success in terms of addiction? Smoking less weed, not shooting heroin, only drinking on the weekends instead of everyday? Never-the-less, there are measurable victories.

Today, a personal success. I was certified as a GAIN administrator (Global Appraisal of Individual Needs). The GAIN tool is a comprehensive, empirically based, widely used assessment. I went to a week long training in October and had to submit taped sessions of myself administering this tool in real client settings. Today, this is the feedback I got from my GAIN trainer, who then submits it to the "inventor" of the GAIN for approval. Hours ago I got their "go-ahead."

Good Morning,

I have attached administration feedback for Jessica Chalifour who works at Child and Family Services in New Hampshire. This is Jessi’s third submission and I am recommending her for administration certification.

Please contact me if you have any questions or need additional information. Thank you!

So, to many, this may not mean anything. However, in my world, this is huge and the culmination of a lot of hard work, perfecting my skill, and mastering the tool. I am so excited and was, additionally, granted the opportunity to become a local trainer of this instrument. Being a local trainer would give me the ability to certify people within my agency to use the tool, and train them in it's implementation. This would make me more marketable, but also means a ton more work for me. It wouldn't be a big deal if I wasn't already in the process of applying for other certifications; my LADC (Licensed Alcohol and Drug Counselor [requires 1 year addictions work, and oral/written exam), LCMHC, (Licensed Clinical Mental Health Counselor [3000 hrs. post-masters work, written exam), and in June I'm attending a week long training to become certified in A-CRA (Adolescent Community Reinforcement Approach [taped sessions in several competency areas with mastery]) But, if I survived Graduate school, I can do this too.

On a final note, this is where I spend the most of my time. My office is finally finished (relocated and redecorated, completely new paint, furniture, and our program [teen services/ASAT] moved to a new building- I am spoiled, I admit, CFS is good to me.) Seriously, how cute is my office???

On the road again...

Q: Where can you find cherry blossoms, 60 degree weather, the Smithsonian, and Pennsylvania Avenue?

A: Washington, D.C.

I leave on Monday, flying out of Manchester, to go to Washington D.C for a conference all next week. I am beyond excited, but also nervous (I hate to fly.) I am definitely looking forward to spending time with Hilary, a coworker I don't get to see often, doing some sight seeing, and eating like a Queen (the company is covering every expense.)

The seminar is JMATE 2008 (Joint Meeting on Adolescent Treatment Effectiveness.) I have a king bed reserved for me at the Grand Hyatt Washington. The hotel is gorgeous and right in the middle of everything. You can access the metro through the lobby to easily get to museums and monuments. While I will be there for business, I'm going to go to the Smithsonian and the zoo (at least.) One of the best things about the hotel besides my room- take the virtual tour, is the Starbucks located in the lobby. My boss is going to hate my expense report this month!

I can't wait! I fully intend to take lots of pictures and keep you updated. I will be bringing my laptop (I do have to work) but may find some time to blog!

The Cherry Blossoms are out! I love DC!

Drugs 101: With Jessi Chalifour, MA

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21568973/

I read the above article and it absolutely infuriated me this morning. I know it's a bit early to be all revved up, but you know me. If you don't feel like reading it I will summarize; truck drivers (the specific target of this article and study) are cheating drug tests. It is mandated that they provide urine samples, and the test facilities aren't secure. There are products available at the testing site to dilute the urine sample or they are cheating using other means. My question: who are the people responsible for administering and validating the tests? By the time you read this blog, I am fully confident you will be better equipped to administer and interpret a drug test than the people responsible in the above article.

There are a few ways to "pass" a drug test when you should come up "dirty," as we call it in the substance abuse treatment world. And because this is a private blog and the average "Joe" won't be reading this, in essence me giving pointers, I will tell you.

First, it depends upon the substance you use. So I will discuss substance before cheating...

Alcohol is very hard to detect in the system after about 24 hours. One test that is pretty accurate is this little piece of paper (which reminds me of the litmus paper in high school chemistry) placed on the tongue and can detect recently consumed alcohol. Recently is the operative word. Treatment facilities often us this as an alternative to the breathalyzer.

Marijuana is much easier to test for because THC, the active ingredient in marijuana, binds to fat cells so it can stay in a person's body up to 30 days (again it depends upon each person, how much they smoked, how often...etc)

Other drugs, like Opiates (Vicodan, Heroin, Opium), Cocaine, Meth, and Amphetamines are harder to detect because, while they do act on receptors, they rely on the blood stream to make their way around the body, hence not staying around too long (which would explain why people use them so frequently throughout the day and can become so addicted. Frequent use = increased tolerance= more substance needed to get the same high...) They are in and out pretty quick. Most of the kids I test regularly use Adderrall (prescribed) to control ADD/ADHD. By the time I get them in the afternoon most if it has cleared out of their body from their morning dose (sometimes it does show up and it comes up as an amphetamine.)

I could go on for hours, as this is so fascinating, but for the sake of time I will move on.

First, my disclaimer: I do not, under any circumstances, condone or encourage the use, distribution, or possession of any substances. Further, the following information is for educational purposes only and I do not guarantee that any of the below circumstances will in fact make someone pass a drug test; nor do I support trying to cheat one:

How I have heard/seen people cheat. There are a ton of ways, but below is what I most commonly encounter:

System Clearing methods: Drinks are available on the Internet that are supposed to clear out your system of drugs, specifically THC. They are very costly, about $50 and rarely work. What some people do not know is that while it may clear out the THC, it also throws off the body's pH level, and most standard tests include a test for pH. Additionally, it requires shipping to your home without being caught by a JPPO (Juvenile Probation and Parole Office) or parent, and requires a lot of planning. If it takes 3 days by mail and you don't know when you are going to be tested, you have to hope you get your drink before you get tested and after you use, and assume it will work. Further, most people don't plan out drug use. It is an act of impulsivity in a lot of cases, so that adds another scenario to the equation. This requires planning.

I have also been asked by a client of mine if this would actually work: He said, "I read on the Internet if you smoked (marijuana) and then drank a gallon of water every hour for 24 hours, worked out, and then ate fatty foods the THC would be pushed off of your cells and you would not be "dirty."

My reaction- First, I asked if there was something he needed to tell me. Second, I explained to him how dangerous this could possibly be. The body can only process about 8 oz. of water every 15 minutes. There is no way a person could drink that much water and not drown. Yes, I said drown. You can actually overwhelm your body with H2O, flush out your electrolytes, and drown. Third, I challenged him in how much work this was for just a few hours of being high. Is drinking a gallon of water every hour for a day, exercising, and eating fried food really worth a four hour high? Lastly, I drug tested him... hehehe.

Dilution: People often water down the sample adding something like baby powder, cleaner, or air freshener. This again will change the oxidation, pH, or what-have-you and the test will come up invalid. In my world-- and I am a hardass (pardon my French) -- if a test is invalid, I call it dirty. You get the option of taking another one (just in case there was something wrong with the test) or you can just sign my paper and I will write "tampering suspected" all over it. Further, I did go to school for 7 years and coincidentally, I was not born yesterday. So when someone hands me a cup full of urine, it's green and smells like piss and Windex, I'd make a safe wager that it didn't come from someones bladder.

Fake samples: This is common. Someone will urinate in a bottle and then use. They will bring in the "good" sample and fill the cups with that. I can't go in the bathroom with them, but what I can do is listen outside the door to the best of my ability. I also always search the person before they take the test. I make them empty their pockets, (sometimes I will find goodies in their pockets; cigarettes, lighters and other paraphernalia which I confiscate.) They must take off jackets, hoodies, an other prime hiding areas. Then, when they give me the sample, I can feel through my gloves if the sample is cold or warm. Hello people? The body's temperature is 98.6 degrees. When you give me a cup of urine that has been sitting in an Aquafina bottle in your backpack in the car all day, and it's 80 degrees, you're either hypothermic, dead, or lying... now again, I'm not a rocket scientist or a betting woman, but I would be willing to put something down on the fact that your cheating.

Purely Laughable Methods: Let me set the scene: It's Thursday evening. "C" = client.
C: Jessi, I haven't had a random drug screen in a while... shouldn't I have had one by now? (Did I just hear the word random?)
J: Sure, if you'd like, I can give you one now.
C: Okay.

Then again on Tuesday, the next time I see them much to their horror, I give them another one. I do have an inkling of what I am doing here and the only reason they would ask for one is because they plan on using over the weekend and think I won't test them for a while if they willingly submit to a test prior.

Now, I must say, I deal with Adolescents 12-22 only. That is my client population. The article above deals mostly with adults, which, while all substance abusers have a knack for manipulation (and that is by no means a generalization or judgement- they have to be savvy in order to not get caught) the adults, I assume, are a bit more sophisticated in trying to cheat these tests. They have different means, more resources, money, experience and so forth. However, it sounds as though this testing facility does not take the necessary and BASIC precautions to prevent tampering. That does not make me rest easy due to the fact that 9% of the subjects in this study were in fact using and getting behind the wheel of a tractor-trailer-truck. And that was 9% just in Washington State.

A few months ago I had someone call me anonymously at my job: This is how the conversation went.

J: Adolescent Substance Abuse Treatment, this is Jessi.
C: Hi, um, I have to take a drug test for my job and I smoke (marijuana). I drank one of those drinks (the expensive ones) and I am just wondering if you can tell me what else I can do to pass this piss test? (what substance abusers affectionately call my urinalysis.)
J: Don't use. (click)

If you stuck with me through that, I hope you found it as fascinating as I do. I would be more than willing and happy to entertain any questions you have about this, or as always, anything.