What the... ?

I haven't been sleeping well lately, even with the assistance of my "boyfriend" so I have struggled to remember my dreams. Last night, however, I had an incredibly strange dream that I remembered parts of when I woke up this morning. I don't remember the sequence of how the dream went but I do recall some of the (strange) main themes.

• I was on a train with my mom and Aaron. My mom's character was played by Congresswoman, Gabby Giffords.
• Adele was in the dining train car singing and playing the violin, which was really a bow and arrow.
• I had to hop from one train compartment to another (using an access panel on the roof) because there was a gift shop on the other train car that was selling a ventriloquist dummy that my father-in-law really wanted.
• After buying the dummy I went back to the dining car to get a bite to eat and order a drink. I asked for a virgin daiquiri and once I had swallowed about 1/2 of the daiquiri, the ventriloquist dummy (who had joined me for lunch and was sitting on my lap because McPepe wasn't on the train) looked at me and said, "There was alcohol in that drink. Your baby will be born without  ears."

It was horrible. I can explain a lot of the things in the dream (Gabby Giffords is all over the news lately, the bow and arrow/train came from reading The Hunger Games, and the baby without ears most likely came from a clip shown on American Idol last night) but some of this, man, I'm at a loss. That dummy scared the crap out of me.

I don't think I like pregnancy dreams... or dummies... or daiquiris anymore.

Wednesday Oui: From Wolfie

I think I've made it abundantly clear that, shamefully, McDonald's Happy Meals (which contain absolutely NO nutritional value with the exception of the apple slices they have added to the box in recent years) is one of my MAJOR pregnancy cravings. I won't lie, I'm really embarrassed to admit it; I feel guilty acknowledging that I'm devouring non-food to support Alien's growth. I've even lowered myself to always carrying $4.14 on my person at all times (the cost of the Happy Meal + tax)

A few weeks ago I received an envelope in the mail from my brother, Wally (A.K.A "Wolfie), I opened it to find this:

Do I have the sweetest big brother, or what? Oui!

Push Present

**Preamble: I intend to be a working-mother. I have no judgments of and completely respect stay-at-home-moms. I also do not judge parents who enroll their child in daycare; it is an option we've discussed at length. Lastly, I love jewelry and I think any woman deserves whatever her heart desires. In short, I don't judge you, so extend me the same courtesy. Gracias.**

While doing a bit of reading on one of my maternity sites I was introduced to the concept of a "push present." Has anyone heard of this? At first, honestly, I didn't know to feel about the idea of a push present; my initial reaction was (and I think I said this out loud), "my healthy baby boy is the only thing I want!" But the more I mulled it over the more I felt like I wanted one.

A push present is a gift presented to the mother of your child after she gives birth (either vaginally or via Cesarean). It's meant to reward/thank/honor the gift she gave to you and her 40 weeks of incredibly painful exhaustion pregnancy. Typical "push presents" are things such as diamond rings, a bauble of the baby's birthstone, or something that can be kept and passed down the bloodline. Sometimes push presents include electronics; that new phone or computer. I've even read that a day of pampering (massages, facials, and/or a mani/pedi) are presented to the new Mom.

While y'all know I really love bling, at this point in my life, I don't have any desire to get a new piece of jewelry; I received my bling in 2008. I'm not into electronics so some fancy schmancy phone or computer isn't my thang. I wouldn't mind a day of pampering but I'll probably feel so disgustingly flabby after I birth Alien that the thought of a masseuse even coming near my (probably) unshaven and stretched out body completely revolts me. What's left?

I really thought about the concept. It's odd how once you (or at least this is true for me) find out you're going to have a baby material is no longer important to you. I didn't feel "right" asking Aaron for something that I would keep in my jewelry box. So, I had to ask myself, what is important to me? Then it clicked; it hit me like a ton of bricks. TIME. My time is precious. My time with my baby boy and my husband will be even more precious, especially once I return to work.

I have complete intentions of returning to work. I want to return to work. We did make the decision, however, that I will only return to work 3 days per week. I'm fortunate in that Aaron gets paternity leave. I'm due at the end of May so once Alien is out, Aaron is done for the year. This means he and I will have the entire summer with our baby. Granted I may work a bit later on in the summer but I won't be teaching and I will at least take the first 6-weeks off. This means I won't have to think about childcare options until September.

So how does this fit into my thoughts about a "push present?" When Aaron and I do return to work, him full-time, me part-time, every second we have with each other and Alien will be precious.
I've decided my push-present will be a nanny-keeper. What, pray tell, is a nanny-keeper, you ask? Well, it's someone I hire who comes to my house 3 days per week to take care of my baby, my dogs and my home.

Brilliant.

Nanny-keepers do light housework (floors, dusting, laundry, and dishes) and take care of my baby and my puppies. It will be so relieving to come home to a clean house after a day of work knowing my baby has remained in the comfort of his home and my dogs have been walked. If I can have this, then I just bought myself some time to relax with my family.

Alien will be the best gift I could ever receive. Maybe I'm greedy to want a bit more time to myself/my family/my child/my husband/my dogs. So, I cave. I am totally buying into the idea of a push present and Aaron is in agreement. We would have to pay for daycare three days per week anyway. What's a few more dollars to keep my baby in his home, my home in good order, and my sanity intact?

I'm officially requesting an Alice for my push present.

*Also, as an aside: I am getting Aaron a "pride present" to celebrate/reward/honor all those times he had to completely swallow his pride and allow me to do/say/eat whatever I wanted while pretending I'm the greatest thing to ever live and wait on me hand and foot.

Mr. Worry

Ever since I went and got myself knocked up (I know, I'm so crude) Aaron has become a worry-wart. I really didn't see that coming simply because he's usually the one to talk me off a ledge of anxiety about my worry-of-the-week! But, it seems the thought of being a Dad has scared the Bejesus out of him. The evidence? Keep reading.

***

A: "I want you to turn the heat up to 75 today."
J: "Why!?" (6 months ago this would probably have been music to my ears. Now, I'm overheated!)
A: "Because the wind is blowing really hard and it's possible we could lose power. I want there to be a good base of heat if that happens."
J: "Okay, fine."
A: "And, if the power goes out... who are you gonna call?"
J: "Ghost-bustersssss!!!" (thinking it would make him laugh)
A: (without cracking a smile) "No, PSNH. You call PSNH."

***

A: "I need a new vehicle."
J: "Well, that's probably not in the cards until next year."
A: "Well, then, I need to get the rust fixed. You could throw a baby through that rust hole!"
J: (speechless)

***

While shopping at Babies R' Us
J: "Do you like this one? The one with the owl for his "coming home" outfit?"
A: "Yes, but that's just a jumper. (It was a onesie) He'll need some pants."
J: "There aren't any matching pants."
A: "That doesn't matter. His little legs will get cold."
J: "Babe, it will be the beginning of June. We'll wrap him in a blanket."
A: "We're getting pants."

***

A: "Why are you using that water bottle?!"
J: "Because I'm thirsty."
A: "That water bottle contains BPA. Remember that article we read about BPA exposure linked to aggressive behaviors in adolescence? Use your pink water bottle. That's BPA free."

***

A: "You're 20 weeks today. You should get your line soon."
J: "My line? What line? My line of cocaine?"
A: "No, that pregnancy line that forms on your stomach."
J: "Oh, the linea nigra?"
A: "Yes."
J: "Oh... (confused) that doesn't happen to everyone... and how the hell did you know about that?"
A: "I have my sources."
(Later I discovered my What to Expect When You're Expecting book in his bathroom)

***

A: "I need to install new windows in the Baby's room."
J: "Why? I like the ones we have!"
A: "They are too close to the floor.'Baby's Name' could fall out of them."
J: "You mean 'Baby's Name' is going to climb out of his crib, unlock the window five feet off the floor, lift the window, pinch the springs to open the screen, lift the screen and fall to his death from the second story window?"
A: "Not if we get new windows."

***

A: "Be really careful out there if you walk the dogs this morning."
J: "Okay."
A: "No, really, it's slick."
J: "Gotcha."
A: "I salted... everything."

***

J: (showing him clothes I bought for Alien) "And this is the outfit he'll wear when we go to the Cape." (We rented a house on the Cape for a week this summer with Aaron's parents & brothers.)
A: "That doesn't cover a lot of skin."
J: "Well, it's going to be July, Babe."
A: "The sun coming off the ocean is brutal. He'll need a hat."
J: "Well, coincidentally, your Mom is making him one for the beach."
A: "Well, he's going to need sunscreen. Like SPF 1000."
J: "I don't think they make SPF 1000"
A: (Walking into another room... mumbles) "We'll paint him."

***

A: "I woke up last night and you were sleeping on your back."
J: "Yeah, I know."
A: "That's dangerous for you."
J: "Yeah, I need to get one of those maternity sleeping pillows at Motherhood."
(A few hours later... planning our errands)
A: "Well, we still need to go the mall."
J: "The mall?!! For what?"
A: "Motherhood. Your pillow!"

***

At Target, Aaron walks up to the Pharmacy. I'm looking at vitamins and overhear the conversation.
A: "Do you have any belly butter here? My wife's belly is *itchy."
(*Your belly gets itchy because the skin stretches)
Aaron walks over to me.
A: "They don't have any here. We should just go online."

***

A: "Have we looked into birthing classes yet?"
J: "No. I feel like it's too early."
A: "We need to look."

Seriously. These have been actual conversations over the past several months. I'm not even going to bother worrying anymore; he's doing it enough for the both of us.

My Mail Order Boyfriend

I'm in love. I'm desperately in love with my new boyfriend.

I am starting to have a really hard time sleeping and/or getting comfortable in bed. Either I turn onto my back (a no-no in pregnancy) or I try to turn onto my stomach (obvious problem) so, I've found my solution. Mr. Boppy, my total body pillow. He's my new mail order boyfriend.

He is the best snuggler in bed, he holds me tight, and he doesn't let me turn in way that's dangerous during pregnancy (or uncomfortable.) He shares the blankets, doesn't snore or breathe on me, and I can throw my leg over him and he doesn't complain. His only flaw? He kind of hogs the bed.

Aaron better watch out; this guy is amazing! (Bing is a fan too!)

The New Birdroom/Home office

Last month I went to North Carolina for a few days to visit one of my best friends, Hilary. While I was there Aaron took the opportunity, as a surprise for me, to begin renovations on our birdroom (the new home office). FYI: It's called the "birdroom" because, well, those of you who know me know that one of my favorite pastimes is birding. This room extends from the back of our house and overlooks our yard where I have several feeders so I can spy on our feathered friends.

Originally this room was more of a mudroom and had only a bench and a bookshelf in it as we had a larger room upstairs that served as our office/craft area. Then, last spring, we found a BEAUTIFUL antique desk at the library and moved it into this room. The desk was SO large that it was the only thing that fit in the room. Later, once we found out there was a little one on the way, we knew the room upstairs, our office/craft room, was destined to be sacrificed and become the baby's room. Thus, this presented a dilemma for us.

I, personally, enjoy small spaces. I don't know why. I just always have. When we were looking for houses we looked at a house that had large, spacious rooms; to me it wasn't comfortable. So, needless to say, I fell absolutely in love with our 1100 sq. ft. antique cape and bought it immediately. Yes, it's small. Yes, I know we will probably have to move in a few years to a bigger (sigh) place, especially if we have additional children (we have a two bedroom/1 & 1/2 bath). But, for now, we're staying put in our tiny hidey hole.

So we had to make a few decisions. The birdroom was going to have to become an official office/craft room. We moved out the giant desk (we have it stored in our basement, however, it will be a nice piece of furniture to pass down to our children and use when we have a bigger home). We also decided to cover up one of the windows to create a full wall of space. Aaron put up new sheet rock and made all new window trim and molding. We also made a trip to Ikea and purchased new furniture. I, of course, picked paint, carpets and curtains.

Now we have a perfect small extension from our kitchen that serves as our new and improved birdroom/craft room/home office/side entry. As I said, it's a small room (8X5) so we made the very best (functional and cute) use of the space.

I am in love with this room.

The original room (pay no attention to Homer, the scary lion growling)

With just the antique librarian desk and side window (and Homer, the ham)

Covered the side window

New sheet rock

First coat of primer (without window/floor molding. Aaron was convinced he needed to make new molding because he thought the old molding probably contained lead paint. Oh, Aaron "Worry" Molloy. That added a few days on to the project but he still insisted even after I promised not to let Alien use the window sills as a teether)

First coat of paint (and a little graffiti courtesy of Aaron)

Voila! View from the kitchen.

This cabinet is amazing. It was advertised as a "shoe" cupboard but I thought, "No, NO, NO! This will be perfect for my scrapbook papers, fabric and yarns!"

A quick note about my ribbon holder: Aaron made this out of one dowel cut in half and two wood blocks- super simple. I think I spent $1.50 on the dowel and wood blocks at Michaels (plus paint).

*Also, please note our license plate art work- This piece means a lot to both of us. The license plates belonged to Aaron's grandfather and the wood was a piece of drift wood that washed up on the shore one day while Aaron and I were taking a stroll on the beach in Portland with Pepe. Pepe liked the piece of wood so Aaron and I took it. One night for a date night we had a great idea... and the "art" is the product of that idea!

This room still has to serve as my birdroom therefore we keep my seeds and corn here so I have easy access to feed my birds (*Note: Aaron is in the process of making a threshold between this room and the kitchen; our next project is to rip up the linoleum in the kitchen and replace it with hardwood, so we might leave the threshold off for a bit- but that's the last thing to do before this room is finally DONE!)

My craft space/supplies

Workspace & Craft space (*Note the shelf in the corner that holds my punches: Aaron's grandfather made that shelf years and years ago. With a coat of paint, it fits my punches perfectly!)

All my equipment!

In total (sheet rock, curtains, rug, chair pad, furniture, paint, shelving/storage) we pulled this off for under $500. Y'all know I'm cheap but if you're crafty you can also find ways to recycle old things to make them functional and new)

Wednesday, Oui? Half Baked!

Today marks my 20th week of pregnancy. What that basically means is that I'm exactly (hopefully) half way there! I don't know why it's advertised that you're only pregnant for 9 months. It doesn't really make sense if you do the math. Now, we all know math is not my strongest subject but... pregnancy is measured in weeks. There are supposed to be 40 of them. The difference is that by the time you find out you're usually about 4 weeks along and the clock starts ticking at the day of your last period. They should say 10 months.

Anyway... I can't believe I'm at 20 weeks already. I am so in love with Alien. It's crazy to love someone so much! Oui?

How far along? 20 Weeks! Alien is half baked! (Would that be "medium rare", or "medium"?)

Total weight gain/loss: As of my 20-week check-up only 10 perfect pounds! At this point it's pretty common to start gaining about 1 pound per week (Eek!)

Baby's size? According to the websites I follow he's about 10+ ounces and the length of the banana I put in my cocoa puffs this morning.

Maternity clothes? I'm wearing them exclusively now. That was a really hard transition for me. I'm pretty vain about my appearance and I have A LOT of clothes. Luckily, my in-laws (Aaron's parents and brothers) bought me a ton for Christmas and my bestie (shout out to Alyssa) gave me all of hers. So I've only spent about $100 on my own. Sadly, the extent of my clothes is about an eighth of what my pre-pregnancy options were. But hey, it's only for about 20+ more weeks, right?

(See that little section grouped together? Yeah, that's it. It's a sad thing.)

Stretch Marks? None yet but I'm on the lookout. I'm really starting to bloom so I'm guessing they are in the near future. I recently stockpiled ordered this product and, as soon as it arrives, I'm going to lube up and hopefully avoid them (fingers crossed!)

Sleep: Yes, please. I'm starting to get to the "uncomfortable at night" stage so sleep is not going too well.

Best moment this week: Not pregnancy related but, we finished the home office!! (pictures coming soon!)

Movement: Little taps, flutters and rolls here and there. I found out yesterday that my placenta is anterior (in the front) so until he gets a bit bigger I won't feel him as much as I'd like to.

Food cravings: Gumballs, Rice Krispie Treats (Thanks McPepe & Nana) Fudgesicles, and peanut butter Oreos (translation: sweets)

Gender: Boy! Boy! Boy! (there's only one in there, though!)

Labor Signs: None yet. As much as I want to meet my little Alien I want him to stay put for another 20 weeks!

Belly Button in or out? Still a bit of a cave... but I did have to order a pregnancy naval ring online. I hope it gets here soon...

What I miss: Caffeine, Advil, being able to see my feet.

What I am looking forward to: I'm *really* just trying to savor every moment of this and not wish anything away. I've made a conscious effort to keep my stress, anxiety, and worry to a minimum. Things will get done. I'm having a baby. That's just such an amazing thing that I want to indulge in every aspect. My beautiful son is the end result and he is worth waiting for. (Although, ask me again in about 12 weeks and it might be a different answer.)

Milestones: I'm half-way there! I thought it would go much more slowly. This has flown!

Other baby updates? We bought him his first outfits last week. This one is my favorite.

( I bought it especially for his Auntie Hilary .. .... ... How cute is he going to be in this?)

(Sorry it's wrinkled! I took it out of his laundry basket- I'm washing and ironing everything before it gets hung in his closet. Crazy? Eh, maybe.)

Photographic Friday: Postcards from the bump

For my friends and family who don't use facebook, here's the update you've been waiting for!

So, we have pictures of Alien! And we know the gender! But first, for those who are interested, an update on the bump.

Now, here are the very first pictures of our little boy (at least since we found out he's a boy)

Realistically, with the amount of heartburn I have, this could likely be his first mugshot.

But really... here's our little boy's picture!

He's quite handsome if you ask me.

Hoping for an Alien encounter

It's so weird. Later today we'll (hopefully) find out whether we're going to have a daughter or a son.

For a good majority of my life I couldn't imagine having children; it wasn't something that appealed to me. I'm career oriented (not that Moms can't be) but I guess that part of me was also pretty selfish. I could not imagine, nor did I want to think about, working a child into my daily schedule.  Now, I can't imagine NOT working a child into my schedule. As each week of my pregnancy has progressed, not only have I fallen more and more in love with my husband and my "little alien," I've also fallen out of love with the idea of working 24/7.

Last weekend when Aaron and I painted the new den (which we refer to as "the birdroom") I said, as part of general conversation, "We're going to be parents." Parents. While it came out so logically it still stopped both of us in our tracks. Parents. That is such a weird thing to actually think about or say out loud. I'm going to be known as "Mama." It's like... you conceive this child, you wait 40 weeks and then it's just handed to you like "here, keep this alive for the next 18 years."

I'm hoping that Alien cooperates today. I desperately want to be able to call him/her by their name. Right now we're calling it Alien, Baby Molloy, Kid, Plummy (don't ask) and then also a combination of our boy/girl name combined (you know, like movies stars do; Bennifer, Brangelina etc.). Come 3:00 it should have a name. Although we AREN'T sharing the names publicly until Alien is born, we will definitely keep you posted as to what gender y'all can expect.

As for pregnancy updates: Overall I feel pretty good. My biggest issue has just been heartburn (like you wouldn't believe- so I fully expect to birth a baby covered head to toe with black hair). My other symptom has been an incredible laziness. I am so lazy that I can't even stand myself.

On Monday, 1/2/12, I felt Alien kicking at me for the first time. I was sitting with a client and I felt this little "bomp, bomp, blurrrp." I had the hardest time keeping it together so I convinced myself it was just a hunger pain or gas. The very next day, it was unmistakable- Alien was kicking (or punching... or doing Morse code). Last night Aaron was able to feel a little tap on the outside. It's so weird.

Alien's current favorite foods are rice crispy treats, gumballs (weird, huh?), ice cream, bagels, red meat and anything with avocado/guacamole (still!). My only food "aversion" has been anything to do with eggs, which is really weird because I normally eat them everyday!

That's really all for the updates right now. Seriously though, tick-tock. 3PM can't come soon enough. Please cross your fingers that Alien cooperates to keep this Mother-ship happy. We all know that patience is NOT my personal virtue; I have 21 weeks to get my lazy ass in gear and my house organized. Boy or girl I personally have no preference (well, maybe a teensy bit) but really, so long as it's healthy and doesn't look like an alien, we're good. So, Alien, don't be bashful today. We want to see your goods. Mama and Daddy will buy you something nice if you show us your privates.

Ugh, I'm already bribing my child. Lord help me.