Sun Salutations

Almost two weeks ago we had our Parent/Teacher conference at Toby's Montessori school. It was a very informative meeting and we were certainly given some helpful feedback about our son's strengths as well as the areas needing improvement. We learned that his language is off the charts (we've known this) we learned he gravitates toward the older children in the classroom, and he is respectful to his teachers. She also told us that he is able to work independently and he shows quite a bit of confidence.

We were told an area in need of improvement is the way he manages his need for gross-motor stimulation within the classroom environment. One of the ways they began working with Toby in this area is by introducing him to yoga. And, as it turns out...

Toby LOVES yoga.

I never saw this coming. I don't love yoga. I can't calm my mind long enough to do yoga. However, according to his teacher, he seeks out the yoga mat at least once per day to do his "Sun Salutations." She said he's getting really good at it and it seems to calm and center him.

This is another reason I'm so grateful for Montessori. I would have never exposed Toby to yoga. But, it's likely that at some point Aaron would have practiced it with him (Aaron likes yoga.) However, we may have thought he was currently "too young" or "too energetic;" completely missing the opportunity to provide him this tool. This makes me appreciate the respect Montessori has on the individual child's needs. It is not at all inappropriate that a three-year-old has boundless energy; it's inappropriate for him to deal with it by doing cart-wheels in the classroom. The fact that this was recognized and redirected, rather than shamed and stunted, further merits our decision to enroll Toby in Montessori.

These are the pictures the teacher provided to us:

Toby asked us for a yoga mat for Christmas. I think we'll oblige. 

Interviews

Montessori has been quite the adjustment for us-- from dress codes, to the elimination of nap time, to schedule changes, social influences, and my (lack of) coping with the inability to control every detail of Toby's day. Needless to say, it has been an interesting couple of months.

Every night, Aaron and I interrogate Toby about his day. We get very little out of him and, when we do, it's usually just the very last thing he did at school, "I put my shoes on the right feet!" This can be incredibly frustrating because we want to know what he does, how he feels, and hear about his day. But, we got to a point where we realized we couldn't hound him with questions because it did nothing but get us a one-way ticket to irritation.

Today I tried something different and it ended up being a really cute activity that we both enjoyed. I decided to interview Toby. We sat across from each other at the dining room table and I explained what an interview was and I told him I was going to take notes. He was really excited to "play interview." It was pretty adorable.

Here are the results:

(He insisted I call him 'Mr. Toby' like the teachers at school.)

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was something you noticed at school this week?"
Toby: "Ms. (Teacher's name) has sharp scissors."

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what is something you learned about this week?"
Toby: "Skeletons and apples. AND OCTOBER!"

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what is something that made you happy this week?"
Toby: "Going caca in the potty all by myself."
Mama: "Excellent!"

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was your job at school this week?"
Toby: "Cleaning up at school was my job."

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was fun at school this week?"
Toby: "Playing in the play yard. I had fun."

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was something you didn't like about school this week?"
Toby: "I don't like the toilet paper at school."
Mama: "Too soft?"
Toby: "Yeah."

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was something you ate at school this week?"
Toby: "A green colored pear. It was juicy and delightful."

Mama: "Mr. Toby, what was something funny this week?"
Toby: "Ummmm, (therapy dog's name) wouldn't lay down. Because he's a working dog."

At this point I could tell he was losing steam so I suggested we end the interview. However, Toby said he wanted to interview me.

Toby: "Ms. Mama, what was your job at work this week?"
Mama: "Talking to people who don't feel well."

Toby: "Who people? Sick people?"
Mama: "Kind of like sick. They have boo-boos on their heart or in their head."
Toby: "Did you give them Band-Aids?"
Mama: "A special kind of Band-Aid."

Toby: "Ms. Mama, did you go potty by yourself?"
Mama: (laughing) "Yes, I did."
Toby: "Excellent job."
Mama: "Thank you."

Toby: "Ms. Mama, did you remember to wipe?"
Mama: (laughing)"Yes."
Toby: "Wipe good?"
Mama: "Sure did!"
Toby: "That's good."

Toby: "Ms. Mama, is it your job to eat ice cream too?"
Mama: (hahaha) "It probably seems that way, doesn't it?"

Toby: "Ms. Mama, did you miss me while I was gone?"
Mama: "Big much. I missed you great big much!"
Toby: "I missed you too. But I stay home with you today and tomorrow and the next day and the next day, right?"
Mama: "You're right, Bud."

His notes were a little more difficult to transcribe. Luckily, I took notes to his question/my answers too.

I love that kid. And I loved doing this. He never ceases to surprise me.

On Dress Codes

If I had one complaint about Toby's Montessori school it would be this:

Dress Code.

Dressing Toby has always been a part time job for me. Or, as Aaron teases, he needs a part time job because of it. At Toby's school he can only wear khaki or blue pants with yellow, blue, or white tops. No logos, patterns or characters.

THAT'S IT!

I die. Every day a little piece of me dies.

So it's shallow, I know, but, I really like to dress my kid. More accurately, I LOVE to dress my kid. Dress code was a really hard pill for me to swallow, and something I gently challenged the director of school about.

Why? If Montessori is all about individuation, why couldn't I obsessively dress him why was he not able to express himself through fashion? Mostly, her answer made sense about distractions in the classroom, equality, and environments conducive to learning. Okay, okay, I see a point. Although, the defiant part of me did want to argue about conformity, individuality, yadda-yadda-yadda. However, I accepted most of her argument.

Except this part:

"Dress code is easier." She said.

"It gives you less choice in the morning." She said.

"It's cheaper. You only need a couple shirts of each color." She said.

Does this woman not know me at all?

Toby Mail!

Growing up, Halloween was a BIG DEAL in my house. My mom would pull out all the stops when the month of October rolled around. Years later, it's evident that her holiday spirit really rubbed off on me.

If you remember, when Toby was little, he had a mailbox we would use to put his personal mail in. It was just a tiny wooden mailbox and he quickly outgrew it. He didn't, however, outgrow his obsession with the U.S. Postal Service, UPS, or FedEx (probably because whenever they arrive there is, likely, something for him delivered.)

Ahhhh, he was so little :(

Recently we decided that since he gets mail pretty regularly (our families often send him cards/letters because they know he loves getting mail- and my mother gifted him subscriptions to three monthly kid's magazines) we decided we better upgrade his delivery service.

Halloween was the perfect time to do this because I was able to work in the idea of The Great Pumpkin. The goal is to use this mailbox much like his other one except he will also, occasionally, get prizes in it- year round. And, most importantly, his letters from Santa and the Easter bunny, etc.

When he woke up this morning and saw the mailbox for the first time he said, "Hey! Something funny is going on around here!" It was adorable and he was BEYOND excited.

His letter from the Great Pumpkin. (Drawing courtesy of my talented husband!)

His mailbox came from Home Depot and was under $15! The letters were under $2!
The Great Pumpkin left him a letter and gifted him a new set of personalized Halloween  magnets for his PlanetBox lunchbox!

The magnets on his lunchbox

The letter from The Great Pumpkin came complete with pumpkin-y fingerprints.
Toby was so excited to see the messy prints on his letter!

We were able to drill it into the wall by his bedroom door after he went to bed without him waking!

The only thing we changed from a traditional box was make a red paper laminated "mail flag" because I imagined he would come around the corner and clip the standard aluminum flag with his head. So, we just used red card stock and Velcro'd it on - so it's not dangerous.

This morning I stopped off at the Dollar Tree to pick up a few things to stuff in his mailbox between now and Halloween (to add to what I previously bought, because, well, I'm insane.) Blame my mother. It's all her fault that I go nuts during _________ (fill in any/every holiday.)

So, there you have it. A pretty inexpensive and personalized way for your kid to get mail (and prizes- hehehe.)

"Seasonal" Comparisons

As 2015 winds down and the sting of Toby starting school has been somewhat numbed by the passing of time (yes, I'm STILL a mess about it) I feel more compelled to write than I have in a long time. Writing is a form of therapy for me and sometimes it brings me so much joy to go back and read my older posts. While I do have a loyal number of readers (I love you guys- big much) in all honesty, readership is less important to me than the documentation is. I like to imagine that some day Toby might appreciate knowing just how much of a gift he has been to my life... and I have the words to prove it.

I've been going through a lot of pictures lately as I try to clean up my hard-drive and organize my photos. I/we take pictures of everything. Some are silly and some are meaningful. I never know how I'll interpret a picture a year later and it's really fun to open up a random folder full of pictures taken over a year ago and have my mind go back to that day.

As I was organizing some photos the other day I came across a picture of Toby at the 2014 "Day Out With Thomas" and it gave me all the feels. Then, it occurred to me, I've never done a comparison post. Many of the blogs I read do it, yet, I never took the plunge. So, while I'm sitting here licking my wounds about my baby going to school and, what feels like, his sprint through childhood, I figured it was as good a time as ever to do a comparison post. I mean, considering I'm already feeling feelings about the rate at which he grows up, why not twist the knife a little?

These pictures are  378 days apart

Day out with Thomas- Year I
7/11/2014

Day Out With Thomas- Year II
7/24/2015

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

These pictures are ~485 days apart

New England Aquarium
1/20/2014

New England Aquarium

5/20/2015

While to some, the changes in the pictures might seem subtle... or normal. To a parent, you know how much your child changed in that time. Physically, developmentally, emotionally. It's profound. When, in our life, do we change SO MUCH in such a short span of time? It blows my mind to think that just 3.5 years ago he wasn't even here. Now he's a person. Our person.

Before I had Toby a good friend of mine said, "The days go slow but the years go fast" and that isn't far from the truth. I feel really confused when I look at these pictures. I know I've said it before-- I absolutely treasure being Toby's Mama. He has been such a gift to my life. Not a gift in the way that he's a great kid; fun to be around, jolly and sweet. A gift in the sense that sometimes I feel I was never really alive until he became what I live for. I know I can speak for Aaron when I say he gave our lives an entirely new purpose.

I'm just rambling now but, as the seasons change, it makes evident the different seasons of life... and how fast the season of childhood/parenthood passes by. It's breathtakingly heartbreaking.