"Seasonal" Comparisons

As 2015 winds down and the sting of Toby starting school has been somewhat numbed by the passing of time (yes, I'm STILL a mess about it) I feel more compelled to write than I have in a long time. Writing is a form of therapy for me and sometimes it brings me so much joy to go back and read my older posts. While I do have a loyal number of readers (I love you guys- big much) in all honesty, readership is less important to me than the documentation is. I like to imagine that some day Toby might appreciate knowing just how much of a gift he has been to my life... and I have the words to prove it.

I've been going through a lot of pictures lately as I try to clean up my hard-drive and organize my photos. I/we take pictures of everything. Some are silly and some are meaningful. I never know how I'll interpret a picture a year later and it's really fun to open up a random folder full of pictures taken over a year ago and have my mind go back to that day.

As I was organizing some photos the other day I came across a picture of Toby at the 2014 "Day Out With Thomas" and it gave me all the feels. Then, it occurred to me, I've never done a comparison post. Many of the blogs I read do it, yet, I never took the plunge. So, while I'm sitting here licking my wounds about my baby going to school and, what feels like, his sprint through childhood, I figured it was as good a time as ever to do a comparison post. I mean, considering I'm already feeling feelings about the rate at which he grows up, why not twist the knife a little?

These pictures are  378 days apart

Day out with Thomas- Year I
7/11/2014

Day Out With Thomas- Year II
7/24/2015

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These pictures are ~485 days apart

New England Aquarium
1/20/2014

New England Aquarium

5/20/2015

While to some, the changes in the pictures might seem subtle... or normal. To a parent, you know how much your child changed in that time. Physically, developmentally, emotionally. It's profound. When, in our life, do we change SO MUCH in such a short span of time? It blows my mind to think that just 3.5 years ago he wasn't even here. Now he's a person. Our person.

Before I had Toby a good friend of mine said, "The days go slow but the years go fast" and that isn't far from the truth. I feel really confused when I look at these pictures. I know I've said it before-- I absolutely treasure being Toby's Mama. He has been such a gift to my life. Not a gift in the way that he's a great kid; fun to be around, jolly and sweet. A gift in the sense that sometimes I feel I was never really alive until he became what I live for. I know I can speak for Aaron when I say he gave our lives an entirely new purpose.

I'm just rambling now but, as the seasons change, it makes evident the different seasons of life... and how fast the season of childhood/parenthood passes by. It's breathtakingly heartbreaking.