Top Ten Tuesday: Toby

Well, the title is quite an alliteration, isn't it?

It certainly has been a while since I've done a Top Ten Tuesday, hasn't it? Remember when I said I wasn't going to make this a baby blog? I am such a liar.

So, without further ado, here are ten facts about the delicious Toby!

1. He loves, Loves, LOVES music. If you put on any music (or sing/whistle) he will smile, squeal and giggle (reference video above.) It melts me. His favorite music is classical, what plays on his play-mat, or his Jewel and Schoolhouse Rock Rocks! discs.

2. Whenever we go out people always comment on how cute he is. I concur.

3. We found him the perfect nanny and we are psyched!

4. When he gets a little bit older he's going to want me to redo his room from his current alphabet/giraffe theme to (mama's other favorite) dinosaurs. He loves dinosaurs, he just doesn't know that yet.

5. He becomes mesmerized when we read to him. He particularly likes books that rhyme. I love reading Giraffes Can't Dance and The Little Blue Truck.

6. He has a fake cough; he uses it when he's looking for attention.

7. He doesn't like onions or Trader Joe's apricot Stilton cheese (we learned that the hard way!)

8. He recently discovered that his fist fits in his mouth.

9. He loves having his diaper changed. He especially thinks it's funny to pee into the breeze when you're changing him.

10. If you press his nose, like it's a little button, he will laugh. It is the best sound. ever.

I cheat at breastfeeding, apparently

Not too long ago I ran into a friend of a friend at Babies R Us. She stopped to congratulate me and take a peek at Toby (who wouldn't want to?). I don't know her that well so it was one of those casual surface greetings where she asked all the usual questions. (I'll call her BRU just to make it simple.)

(We first exchanged pleasantries):
BRU: "How old is he?"
J: "9 weeks."
BRU: "He's so cute! How much did he weigh at birth?"
J: "6lbs 4oz.; just a peanut."
BRU: "How is he sleeping?"
J: "He sleeps great... 7-9 hours at night"
BRU: "Oh MY God?! 7-9 hours!!! You're kidding!"
J: "Nope, we're pretty lucky; he's a really good baby. He barely cries, too!"
BRU: "How on earth do you get him to sleep that long? My little girl wouldn't sleep for more than 3 hours! How does he go that long without nursing?! Do you have to get up and pump?"

PAUSE:

Okay, so let me stop there and explain something. It pisses me off, to NO END, when someone just assumes you breastfeed. Yes, I nurse. Yes, I know that it is proclaimed to be the very best thing for a baby and offers a bazillion health benefits. However, there are a lot of people I care about that didn't nurse or couldn't nurse either for personal, medical or other reasons. I DO NOT judge people who don't nurse and I have a serious issues with people who do.

REWIND: PLAY:

BRU: "How on earth do you get him to sleep that long? My little girl wouldn't sleep for more than 3 hours! How does he go that long without nursing?! Do you have to get up and pump?"
J: "Unfortunately, I can't produce enough milk for him so we supplement with formula. I give him about 3.5 ounces before he goes to bed and he sleeps right through. If I don't get up and pump it doesn't make a difference with my supply."
BRU: (Silent for a moment) "Oh, well then, with my next one maybe I'll just cheat too and stuff them with formula before they go to bed so I can get some sleep. I just couldn't bring myself to feed her formula!"

Then she giggled and shrugged her shoulders.
I wanted to punch her in the throat.
But, I took the high road:
J: "You're very lucky you didn't have to supplement with formula! Toby would starve if I didn't supplement. Good seeing you!"

Then I beat her to a pulp. No, I didn't... but, I wanted to.

Cheat? What the hell does that mean? What I wanted to say was:

"Oh, by cheat you mean the weeks I spent crying my eyes out because I didn't know what the hell was wrong with my supply? Or do you mean the 3+ cups of Mother's Milk Tea I drink on a daily basis (in 90 degree weather [!!!]) so I can produce a measly 3-5 ounces of breast milk per day? Or, I'm sorry, did you mean pumping 2-4 times per day on top of nursing 6-8 times per day? Or is it the Fenugreek herbs I take that make my piss and sweat smell like maple syrup that constitutes cheating? I know, it must be the 3-3 hour appointments I went to with lactation consultants while they watched me nurse and pump to rule out that I wasn't an idiot and it wasn't user error? Now back up and shut your pie-hole before I knock you out!"

11 years ago I had breast reduction. It was deemed medically necessary and my physician practically begged me to do it. I had terrible migraines and back and neck issues. I was warned, because they removed a significant amount of breast tissue, that my ability to nurse might be jeopardized. I was in my early 20's; the thought of having a baby (or nursing it) was so far off my radar.

I wouldn't go back and change it; I am so much happier with my body. I feel better physically and mentally. BUT, I won't lie, it does suck that I can't exclusively breastfeed my baby therefore, I could do without the judgements.

That said, it is really hard for me when I hear people say:

"Ugh, my freezer is so packed with breast milk, I can't fit anything in it."

• I have never been able to pump enough to store. I usually get about 20cc. (30cc = 1 ounce) I would give anything to produce enough to feed my son, let alone, freeze!

"Oh, my boobs are so sore because they are so full. I can't even stand it! You know what I mean?"

• No. I was never engorged. I have never had that "full feeling" Neither has Toby :(

"Oh, I forgot to wear a breast pads one day and boy, I was leaking everywhere!"

• Once, I got a small stain on my shirt about the size of a pencil eraser. I was so proud. I showed it to Aaron. We celebrated.

"Ugh, breastfeeding is just so much work! I wish I could just do formula, like you do."

• Formula is expensive. It's hard work washing and sterilizing bottles and always packing something for Toby to eat if we go anywhere. I don't have a drive-thru on my chest. I wish I did, like you do.

Still, I try. I nurse 6-10 times per day. I pump at least twice per day. I wear breast pads just in case I'm lucky enough to leak. I drink 2-3 cups of Mother's Milk tea. I take Fenugreek daily. I eat lactation promoting foods. I massage and use warm compresses.

Yeah, I totally cheat at breastfeeding.

Completely milk drunk

Three precious moments

There are three specific things about Toby's birth (and the days that followed) which I just recently remembered.

1. In the delivery room I remember the doctor asking Aaron if he wanted to cut the cord. It's a blurry memory as I had just met my little boy for the first time (and I was in a great deal of pain) but, I specifically remember watching Aaron carefully cut the cord. I can recall at that very moment thinking how meaningful and appropriate it was that Aaron was the one to officially make Toby self-sufficient. I don't even know if that makes sense but, I just remember feeling so humbled.

A minute or so later, after Aaron cut the last "physical connection" I had with my son, the doctor handed Toby to the nurse who brought him over to be weighed/cleaned, etc. Aaron, without even taking another glance at me, followed our son. I remember feeling surprised by this. During my entire labor Aaron never left my side; Aaron never leaves my side. I felt so happy that his natural instincts set in and I didn't have to tell him to go be with our baby. I don't know what I had expected...maybe for Aaron to check with me to make sure it was okay to leave my side? He just did what he felt was natural and didn't look to me for direction. At that moment (in my eyes) I watched my husband become a daddy.

2. I was remembering yesterday how I felt when the nurse wheeled me to my maternity room. I had Toby in my arms, the nurse was pushing my wheelchair and Aaron was walking beside us. The nurse stopped suddenly and told Aaron to reach up and press a button on the wall. When he did this, Brahms lullaby played throughout the entire hospital announcing Toby's birth. I remember feeling so overwhelmed by love.

3. I was also thinking about the day we brought Toby home from the hospital; it was surreal. The entire time we were in the hospital Toby had this "low-jack" thing on him. Basically it was this device he wore around his itty-bitty ankle that would set off an alarm if he was brought past a certain check-point (in case someone tried to steal him). When our nurse walked us to the door and took off his low jack I felt like he was officially ours. Aaron and I got in the elevator and just as we were about to walk out into the world with our perfect little infant, Brahms lullaby played throughout the hospital announcing another little life entering the world.

Those are some of the most precious moments of my life.

You can see his "low-jack" in this one

Our very first family photo just before we checked out of the hospital

Toby, on his way home.

Cape Cod

The last week in July Toby went on his first family vacation

to Cape Cod. We had a lot of fun...

There were rabbits everywhere!!

McPepe read to Toby for the first time (Nana did too but she NEVER permits photographs.)

This is scary ^

I guess I know what Aaron will look like in 20+ years.

Not too shabby...Did I say that out loud?

I couldn't resist. Yes, I'll let him choose his own team

(with plenty of encouragement!)

Also, notice my lollipop; I buy those everywhere.
 I'm addicted to those sugary sticks!

The Edward Gorey house. I love, love, love him.

All the Molloy doggies came for the fun!

Chatham lighthouse

Tons and tons of seals. (No sharks though)

On the way home we stopped in Plymouth to check out Plymouth Rock. I had never been there before. I had no idea it was just a little... rock. I had always imagined something massive!

The Mayflower II

It was a fun trip. We didn't get to do as much as I would have liked to... perhaps next year we can fit in more sightseeing. But, all in all, it was a great way to end my maternity leave.

Traveling with a baby is less stressful than I had imagined which is great because it's really important to me that Toby is exposed to our beautiful world. Hopefully he'll love to travel as we have a few more trips planned before the weather gets cold!!

Toby: 2 months old

So, this post is a few days late because we were in Cape Cod when Toby actually turned 2 months old but, rest assured, we celebrated Mr. Mister's two month birthday in style!!

Here are his most recent stats:

• As of his 2 month check-up he was a whopping 10 lbs. 10 oz. and 23.5 inches long!
• He only fits in a few of his newborn outfits now (sad face).
• He babbles, coos, and swats; it makes Mama so proud when he meets his developmental milestones.
• He's had 411 diaper changes (whew!)
• During his second month of life he started laughing and responding to our voices.
• He will also track objects (most of the time) with his eyes.
• We started adding rice cereal to his bottles because our doctor suggested it might help with his reflux... so far so good! He seems more content and satisfied after eating now too.
• He sleeps at night! Boy oh boy does my baby sleep like a champ (knock on wood). It almost makes me feel badly when we put him down at night because he'll sleep 8-10 hours when he has a nice full belly. The exchange is that he doesn't sleep for long periods of time during the day. He'll sleep 30 minutes here and an hour there, which means Mama has to keep him occupied (and she doesn't get a whole lot done!)
• He's had a lot of visitors over the past month and handles traveling and company very well.
• He still BARELY cries. He'll fuss from time to time but, most people who meet him always comment on how easy going he is.

Updates on Mama and Daddy:

• I go back to work August 6th (Booooo, Hissssss)
• I've pumped 71.1 ounces of breast milk on top of nursing him. I have never been able to pump enough to freeze, however, so I just give it to him in a bottle before he goes to bed.
• Aaron still has a month left before he goes back to work... lucky ducky!
• We are taking Toby to his first class on Tuesday, Kindermusik. We're very excited about this.
• I am also in the process of interviewing for the nanny position. Luckily we have a little under a month to find the right fit for our family.

Here are some new pics of the delicious Mr. Mister... He becomes more awesome with each passing day! Eat your heart out!